...the more things to be read by the ones filled with thouhgts...

Assalamualaikum and peace be upon you...

For those who asked...
And those who wondered...
And those who searched...
The meanings of my words...

Sometimes you have to go places with characters and emotions within yourself you don't want to do, but you have a duty to the story and as a storyteller to do it.
Hugh Jackman

I am but a teller of tales...
Telling the tales of a man who was onced alive...
Telling the tales of a man living death..

It is the story-teller's task to elicit sympathy and a measure of understanding for those who lie outside the boundaries of State approval.
Graham Greene

All say, "How hard it is that we have to die" - a strange complaint to come from the mouths of people who have had to live.
Mark Twain

Unbeing dead isn't being alive.
e. e. cummings

Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.
George Bernard Shaw

I am but a witness...
Not to the things that will come to past...
Nor to the things that is the past...
Not to the scene of another man's stage...
But to the dramas that is intimate...

Faith is a continuum, and we each fall on that line where we may. By attempting to rigidly classify ethereal concepts like faith, we end up debating semantics to the point where we entirely miss the obvious-that is, that we are all trying to decipher life's big mysteries, and we're each following our own paths of enlightenment.
Dan Brown

While I thought that I was learning how to live, I have been learning how to die.
Leonardo da Vinci

I am but an actor...
an actor with no will...
an actor with no might...
an actor with no charecter...
an actor with no words...

When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, "I used everything you gave me".
Erma Bombeck

Life is a long lesson in humility.
James M. Barrie

For those who asked...
And those who wondered...
And those who searched...
The meanings of my words...
Know of this, and, only this...
They are meaningfull words...
With meaningless meanings.

It takes a long time to understand nothing.
Edward Dahlberg

True thoughts are those alone which do not understand themselves.
Theodor Adorno

We shall see but a little way if we require to understand what we see.
Henry David Thoreau

...and the cuts are getting deeper...

Assalamualaikum and peace be upon you...

Life is not an easy matter... You cannot live through it without falling into frustration and cynicism unless you have before you a great idea which raises you above personal misery, above weakness, above all kinds of perfidy and baseness.

Leon Trotsky

Hearrrrrgh!!!! Slash! Klang! Kling! Swoosh! Rippp...!

A slow stream of blackish red blood flowing from the Demon's chest down to the brown pavements of the Castle of Herbs - the place where the Jester served his wordly master. The Demon fell down on his knees. One hand tremblinly holding the Broken Sword of Destiny to brace himself from sprawling down. He can only look at the flowing blood.

"I can't let Jester sees my blood..." thought the the glorified child of agnus...

Twas the eigth dawn of the Day of Weakening.

The Demon went to pay homage to the Necromancer at the mouth of the Souther Path's route that day. There, the Necromancer conjured a curse - something that is both good but yet evil, on the glorified child of agnus using the mantra taken from the knowledge of Choosen Dark Sages. He managed to repelled the curse, but, it still managed to disoriented his mind and shook the brimstone wall of his black heart. The Necromancer's reasons for doing what he did is beyond the Demon apprehensions.

The Demon ran and he ran as fast as his weak legs allow him.

He went to the Foreign King Castle where the Jester served. Today is he will spar with the Jester. Sparring with Jester have always been enriching and healing for the Demon's chaotic mind. "Today I'll learn more" so thought the lonely lost soul of Hell's Hearth. He arrived at the tavern where he has always sits and be merry with the Jester. He proclaimed his arrival to Jester by whispering to the wind.

When the the enlightened sobrette came, he came with weapons yielded. He charges towards the glorified son of agnus with such passion, such fiery spirit that he has - like he always does whenevere they sparred. His mouth muttering the chants that he always chanted...

"I'll beat you again Jester! This is my craft and mastery...you know it! HAHAHAHAHA!!!" shout the agnus child cheerfull. Happy. Happy as he has always enjoyed the spar that the have together.

But today is the Day of Weakening.

When the Jester swung his Sword of Dark Enlightenment, while muttering the Chants of The Darker Path, the Demon felt a weakening and painfull sensation poking his brimestone heart. He feels debelitates and inanimate. What he has always managed to occlude can no longer occluded.

He felt pain in his chest.

He saw blood.

Jester's Sword of Dark Enlightenment and Chants of The Darker path, the Necromancer's curse have had a momentus effect on the glorified child of agnus. They could never have such an effect.

Never.

In his beatened kneeling pose. With a trembling hand gripping hard on the holder of his broken Sword of Broken Faith. With blood streaming slowly to his feet. He was once again humbled. The One True Master has once again taught him humility. The Demon's weak eyes stare thankfully at Jester's worried face. "Thank my friend..." his lips mutter gently to the confused Jester.

"Thank you my One True Master." His heart whispered to his Lord who resides in the Unseeb Tangent Kingdom. "To day, I truly bow to thee..."

Twas the Day of the Weakening.

Twas the tale of the Demon.

...the greater my sadness is...

Assalamualaikum and peace be upon you....

Sadness does not inhere in things; it does not reach us from the world and through mere contemplation of the world. It is a product of our own thought. We create it out of whole cloth.

Emile Durkheim

The Demons' heart is like a citadel made of blackened brimestones. In this citadel, lays streets that runs in chaos and very confusing muc like the paths within a maze. In each paths a Minatour stands guard. On the sides of these streets, stands shacks and towers and ruins and mansions. In them, dwells thieves and bandits and lyches and efreets and imps. In the heart of this citadel erect a tower made of black steel forged from the hearth of hell. In this tower a warlock rules.

Beneath the hellish grounds of the citadel, there are dungeons and torture chambers and fiery pits. Within them, paradise priest were confined, crusaders were crucified and angels were burned. From the break of dawn to the break of another dawn, the eery cries of these creatures of haven could be heard. They cry not for mercy nor freedom. They cry for vengence and oaths to regain supremacy over the creatures of the time where light is shy.

Sometimes (often too short of a time) the dungeon masters of the citadel were overpowered by the creatures of of haven. These creatures reign and supreme over their adversaries. When this occured, light shine in every inch of the citadel. The shacks and ruins and towers and mansions turned into gardens and arches and minarets and manors. The once dark dwellers of the citadel were no more - blinded and burned or killed of prisoned by the light that illuminate the citadel. The streets are straigthened and guided. The warlock is also gone. Defeated by a wondering wizard. The brimestones turn into bricks made from gold.

But times like this is often short.

No more calmness in the Demons' heart. Only chaos and confusion.

The Demon only can kneel to an unseen shrine. Head bowed. Palms clasping on the holder of a rusty broken sword. The Demon is too tired by the war that rages in his heart. The pain and agony is too tolling. The Demon can only cry and hope and hope and cry to his One True Master.

Cry in hope that He glance at him...

Hope that He hear his cries...

Cry in hope He embraces him...

Hope that He wipes his tears...

...the more days of torments i would have to face...

Assalamualaikum and peace be upon you....

A bore is a person who opens his mouth and puts his feats in it.

Henry Ford

Pain of love lasts a lifetime.

Jean Pierre Claris De Florian

It is the Day of the Mundanes.

The Demon has always love the Day of the Mundanes. Everything starts on the Day of the Mundanes. Its the day where all the work , all the hassle began to evolve in to tight crazy knots, the day where we all plan our war path. All the trade routes are unusually unsually congested on the Day of the Mundanes. The day where our self-slavery would start for seven dusks and seven dawns.

The Demon love the Day of the Mundanes very much. It is the day where he could drown all of his boredness in by adhering to the Pit Masters. Every past grains of the sands of time during the Day of the Mundanes stimulates his mind with challenging quests, testing his physical might with heavy tasks.

The Demon's Day of the Mundanes are no longer the same.

The Demon has no quests no more. It has been like this for almost four cycle of the moon. Some of the Day of the Mundanes in that four cycles are nice, but most of them dull.

This Day of the Mundanes is the worst so far.

For the whole day the Demon did nothing. Nothing is a bad thing. It dulls the mind. Weakens the body. Yes, the Demon felt so weak. He is bored and lonely. He misses much of the life he once had. The life where he is free to roam the earth, lavishing in the chaos, where the only rules that dictate him are his rules and those of the One True Master.

The Demon is scared.

He misses the Princess much. Too much. He knows that there will be no ends to this unholy union that he has with her. Both of them came from two different planes of reality. Two realities that could never co-exist harmonically. He knew deep in his darkened heart that this union would only bring war to the rulers and minions of the two planes.

The Demon is filled with anger in him. He wished that he is not born as an agnus - not the kind of thoughts that would bring favors from the One True Master. But like any other agnus, he can't help himself of having such thoughts. In his mind and in his darkened heart, he has distanced himself from the Princess. He wanted to tell her of this, but those angelic eyes of hers always mellows him down. Her songs always rattle the black brimstone wall of his heart.

He has to end it. A creature of the Tangent Haven would only be wretched in the company of a creature from Hell's Hearth. This truth kills him painfully slowly. He is in agony.

Days like this makes it worst.

...the greater smacking i got from God...

Assalamualaikum and peace be upon you…

Faith is spritualized imagination.

Hery Ward Beecher

Yep yessiree! I really got a good one from God yesterday – well not exactly a smacking but rather a reminder on life. I spent the whole night contemplating on the lessons that God thought me yesterday, thus providing me with the excuse for not writing this yesterday…hehehe.

Here’s the story…

I went to meet a couple of friends at different time intervals yesterday. The King and The Jester (later on in life I’ll tell why I named them like I named them). Back to the story, I went and met The King first. On the way to the mountain where he oversees his kingdom (not a big one but still significant), I was a bit down thinking about not being able to generate enough money during the eleventh month of the year. The Faraway Princess, The Regents and The Mamak Bendahara have yet to fail in reminding me of this fact – adding more head cracking headaches to my tiny little head. Like all those who are troubled in life, all I can do is sighing out loud, blaming everything and everyone except my self for my incompetence.

I reached at the King’s mountain at somewhere around two. He was quit busy going trough an intelligence report of a spy from the kingdom of bandits. So I decided to let him be and meet him when the shadow is longer than the pole. When the time has come, we met. The King has asked me to accompany him to see his stable-master. So we went to stables. The King presented me with a really big surprise! He’s having all three of his silver chariots modified – an average of 10 grand each! “Damn!” I said to my self.

Damn!

This is the first lesson God gave me.

I told the King that I’m proud of him, and I do feel a tinge (yeah right!) of jealously of him.

The King and I have known each other since the middle ages. He hails from a kingdom somewhere in middle earth. He was not born in a royal family. His family was mere servants to the aristocrats. He never had the tutorage meant for kings like I had. He is where he is by thwarting the ogres, demons and imps that guarded the treasures of life. He thwarted them with his bare hands.

“I envy of you”

“hehehehe” he replied “why should you?”

“ye la, you got all this, I work like hell but still I have nothing…not even a job!”

“demon,” he says “bow to God, have faith in Him and in your self, question not of HIS work, and do it without asking anything from HIM except for HIS blessings and love.”
Wham! Bam! Boom! Knock out. The demon has left the building.

After that conversation which continues to be a very lengthy detail which I don’t have the might to write, the King took me to the kingdom where the Jester entertained his sire. The Jester served a foreign master whom like him very very much. (Well he must have – if not he wont kept the Jester for four years). We arrive there quit late, the King have some other thing to so he left me there with the Jester who has an inverted smile on his face. What do you expect? I was almost an hour late.

We both had a sip of our poison before we make our move to the Tower of Unseen Riches. During the time we were sipping our poison, (which continued on the way) the Jester began to tell his tales. He said that being a court Jester is not easy. Day in day out he have to make sure his sire is happy by making jokes on the other members of the court – form the wizards down to the peasants. It is his responsibility to his sire.

But he is not happy.

Time for God’s second lesson.

Jester told me that he is unhappy because although he has completed his duties for his sire, he has neglected much of his duties to his one true sire – God.

I knew Jester way back in the dark ages. We grew up together. Both of us came from Kings and Queens whose linage traces back to the oracles of haven. Both of us were brought up with great love and great wealth befitting inheritors of kingdoms. We were sent to the greatest of wizards. But even all that love, with all that wealth and with knowledge, we still have to bow to masters of different kingdoms to earn our keep. My path is slightly different from the Jester’s (tell you of my story later on in life).

Jester told me, even though he is of blood that flows down from haven, his sire have showered him with wealth and the wealth that he has gained from the Tower of Unseen Riches is beyond the imagination of mere peasants, he still is laden with unhappiness and inadequacy in terms of the material things. This has been the case even after he has be wedded Chenow White. “Don’t get me wrong, Chenow White has nothing to do with all this.” He said. He told me that all these is because of his negligence of his duties towards his true sire.

“The One True Sire has given me much” he said. “So much and so graciously – even when I am too arrogant to bow my head to HIM.”

“I envy you” said the Jester using the exact same words that I have uttered to the King earlier. “You, my dear demon, never failed to fulfill your to duties to the One True Sire no matter what.” If only he knew. Jester continues telling me that he has set an absolute resolution and has been for the past two week kept true to it. He has and is disciplining himself to immediately answer to all of the calls of the One True Sire’s summoner - all five calls. Even if he has to go against the stomping stampede of the Glittering Emperor’s herd heading back to their barns when the sun beginning to hide it self beyond the horizon.

“I envy you” said the Jester again.

“I envy you because all this while you have been telling me of this - this sweetness that one could have just by loving HIM truly. All this while I have been too arrogant to HIM even when I knew that HE is my true Master”

The demon black out. Two knock outs in one day.

When I got back to my pit, I began to think and reflect back at what God has taught me today. I felt ashamed. I am humbled. I knew now of the thing that I should known earlier. I have found the answers that I’m seeking.

That night I bowed to HIM.

Sincerely.


p/s at the time I was writing this, God taught me another lesson, this time trough the Princess. I’ll tell you of this later on in life.